Meeting Celebrities - a docJEWmentary

While finalizing plans for my Halloween weekend, I had finally come to terms with the fact that I would not be attending the sold-out concert of one of my very favorite bands, Jimmy Eat World. No sooner had I made this assessment when I received a text from my friend James informing me that not only had he won tickets to the concert, but a chance to attend a private sound check with the band before the show. Sold!

So off we went Saturday afternoon, and after waiting for some time were escorted to the front of the stage. The guys played a few songs just for us (and for the sound check, of course) before coming down to sign photos for us. We were at the mercy of a professional photographer for photos with the band... so may not have gotten the perfect photos, but still awesome!

Jim (not zoomed in)

Me with Tom, Rick, and my friend James

The concert itself was amazing. It was a costume concert (what with it being Halloween and all) so many people were dressed up. Before the concert we'd seen some creepy ones, including a jawa wandering around. (If you don't know what a jawa is, it's those little guys from Star Wars that wear the cloaks with the glowing red eyes...) He stood near me for a minute and then walked away. I remembered thinking to myself, "Wow... that could be anyone." When the band went on stage.... sure enough, there was Rick the jawa on bass!

He'd been right there...

Anyway, it was a lot of fun to see the guys dressed up. They played a great show (and long... nearly two hours of JEW!) Definitely the best Halloween party I've ever been to!

____

"Meet a Celebrity" has been replaced with "Play Laser Tag" on the Everlasting Bucket List.

Losing Sleep

Here I am again... 1:00am. A mere 5 hours from the time I need to get up and begin another exciting day in the life of Ami. I thought this would be an appropriate time for this particular musing.

A few months ago, someone spoke in church about discovering what keeps us up at night. His idea was that this would help us identify our most prominent personal obstacles or challenges. Tonight as I lay sleepless, I have made a list (since I'm great at making lists) of my most common snooze-robbing culprits.

1. Reviewing events of the day, whether good or ill.
2. Fear of having a dream involving the loss of all of my teeth. This is quite literally my worst nightmare. It visits me at least once a week.
3. Neighbors/Roommates. Nothing more to say here.
4. Caffeinated painkillers. I'm a firm believer that if Midol can't fix it, it doesn't exist. Except, of course, for insomnia.
5. Concerns for my future.
6. Regrets from my past.
7. Anxieties about current happenings. (Work, family, relationships, politics...)
8. Heartburn. Thank you, family, for the acid reflux.
9. Frustration regarding my inability to sleep. Counterproductive.
10. Miscellaneous. This is the category for all the dumb things like to-do lists and obnoxious song lyrics that keep my mind from winding down properly.

A certain friend of mine would just tell me to take an Ambien. Maybe, though, there are things to learn about myself when I have nobody else to talk to.

Perfection... O.B.O.

I've noticed a question popping up frequently lately... from family, friends, coworkers, and clients (who love to delve into my personal life.)

What are you looking for in a man?

To which I usually reply, "I don't know," or "I'll know when I find it." The truth, however, is that neither of these responses are accurate. I have an idea of what I want, but probably wouldn't recognize it if it was staring me in the face. (Besides that I don't like to be stared at.. so this would be a total turn-off.) It occurred to me that part of the reason for all the confusion is a contradiction in messages that have been programmed into my head for some time.

"You're not going to find your perfect man."
vs.
"Don't ever settle, girl!"

In an attempt to satisfy both, I've formulated a checklist. Apparently there isn't a soul on this planet who meets all of these ideals, but if I find anything remotely close, I'll take it.
Here we go:

~ OFFICIAL PERFECT-FOR-AMI CHECKLIST ~

_ Weighs more than I do. (Yes, this is important.)
_ Enjoys watching college football.
_ Not completely repulsed by reptiles. (Lyle wouldn't have it.)
_ Appreciates playing and/or watching basketball.
_ Will play catch with me upon request.
_ Plays or has played in a band. (Not marching.)
_ Is proud of my DanceDanceRevolution skills rather than embarrassed.
_ Dresses decently.
_ Does not have a completely inappropriate sense of humor.
_ Likes to sing. (Whether he's good at it or NOT.)
_ Has a motivation towards something beyond Playstation, XBox, or Nintendo.
_ Capable of changing brake pads and oil filters.
_ If he likes country music, neither Big&Rich nor Toby Keith are in his top 5.
_ If he likes hip hop music, neither Outkast nor Lil Wayne are in his top 5.
_ If he likes alternative music, Nickelback is not in his top 100...thousand. (Non-negotiable.)
_ Not a jerk when driving.
_ Minimal ear hair.
_ Not addicted to pornography. (Harder to find than you would think.)
_ Mild tempered.
_ Likes me. A whole lot.

And then of course he has to be a generally good guy with a strong testimony and respect for women. If I could get a majority of these things, that would be perfect enough for me.

Am I reaching for the stars here?!?

Hot Mess?

Every once in a while, I find myself doing alright...getting things done, looking fabulous, etc. It's usually during one of these fleeting moments that I choose to proclaim to the world that I, in fact, have nothing together.

There was the time I spilled Coke in my lap just before getting off a plane, then having to walk through the airport and wait for my ride with a wet crotch. Then there was the time I scored a lead roll in a girls' camp skit and somehow managed to flash the church leaders right in the middle of it.

This afternoon we had a dinner immediately following our church meetings. I was asked to bring a lasagna. I got up this morning, put the lasagna in the oven (since it needed to bake for a few hours), and managed to time it just right. I was showered and ready for church with a few minutes to spare on the timer. I carefully situated the casserole in my car so it wouldn't slide around. Off to the church I went!

In my four inch heels, I grabbed my purse, my notebook, my scripture case, and still managed to balance the lasagna tray on my fingertips. When I reached the door of the chapel, nobody was close enough to get the door. I noticed I had a free left pinkie. Why couldn't I open it myself? I'd managed everything else so beautifully. I realized that there was a good reason not to try it as my lasagna landed (ride side up, luckily) on the sidewalk. In the panic that followed, I hurriedly trip to get what hadn't splattered back in the pan, I burned my hand. Of course.

A few good friends cleaned up the cheese glob on the sidewalk as I iced my hand in the kitchen and tried to make what was left look somewhat edible.

Was this a tragic event? No. Simply a reinforcement of the fact that I am a mess.

In the Raw... (no nudity)

Well, I did it. On August the 17th, 2010... I ate sushi. With the help and savvy of my good friend Jessica, I've actually accomplished a goal from the Everlasting Bucket List. This occasion was monumental enough to warrant photographic proof.


This is the sushi from a restaurant called Koni Grill. Looks okay, right!?


This is my mentor giving me the chopsticks tutorial.
And this...


Is me taking my first bite ever of sushi!


The verdict:
Sushi is disgusting. The textures, the flavors (or sometimes lack thereof) were a little off for me. there were a lot of things on the menu I would much rather have had. Will I ever have sushi again? It's safe to say it wouldn't be my idea. I'm definitely glad to have the experience! Thanks, Jess!


"Eat Sushi' has been replaced with "Get a Spray Tan" on the list.

Truly Everlasting

So... some of you may recall the unveiling of the ever-so-clever "Everlasting Bucket List." Some of you may even have been thinking, "Wait, wasn't the idea that Ami would be working toward accomplishing those goals, all the while replacing them with new goals? What's the hold-up?"

Short answer: I'm lame.

Long answer: Some of these goals are much more impossible than they seem. Let me give you a few examples of the roadblocks along my way.

1) I've been growing poorer with each passing month. With just this one excuse I can wipe out "Take a dance class," "Play the harmonica," "Visit New York," "See Versailles," "Get a Passport," and "Get a massage."

2) I live in the desert and it's summertime. This removes "Snowboard," "Go rock climbing," and "Camp in the mountains."

3) A few of them are very obscure. I've done some serious searching and have not found any record of a "Gunther" anywhere in the state of Arizona.
Also, apparently the only places to legally hold a koala are actually in Australia. Did I mention I'm broke?!

4) Some are just out of my hands. This includes "Meet a celebrity," and "Win some money." Although a girl at church this week told us all how the singer of Linkin Park walked into Subway the other day. I go there all the time! I guess I'm just one of those people that are in the right place at the wrong time. *Sigh*

That pretty much covers them all... except for "Eat Sushi." The problem with this one is that when I decide it's dinnertime, I almost never think about raw fish. As soon as I find the motivation to choke down some slimy seafood, you'll all be the first to hear about it.

All in good time. I guess I just didn't expect the list to be quite so everlasting!

Cry Baby

I recently had an interesting weekend. I don't consider myself to be an overly emotional individual, but I did a surprising amount of crying during these few days. In contemplation of my irrational waterworks, I decided to make a mental list of things that do and don't make me cry. This mental note has blossomed into a somewhat not-well-thought-out blog post. Here we go.

Things that DO make me cry:

1. Patriotic Music. If it mentions pilgrims' pride, patriot dreams, or bombs... I'm bawling.
2. Christmas. It has always been depressing for me, and not in a magical way. Still haven't quite put my finger on that one.
3. Ambulances. These are a cruel reminder that someone somewhere is always in trouble and needs help. Sometimes I even feel guilty for being fine.
4. Home Videos. Life was so much simpler back then... I was cute and everyone loved me.
5. Worldwide Sporting Events. The Olympics, World Cup, X Games. Can't get enough. I should have worked harder as a child to become great. Now I can only be great at spectating... and ogling athletes.
6. Unlikely Sad Scenarios I make up in my mind when I don't know what's really going on. I'm a serious worrier.

Things that DO NOT make me cry:

1. Movies about Dying Animals. Old Yeller, Marley & Me, etc. Seriously?!... Remember in Where the Red Fern Grows how everyone cries when the dogs die, but nobody wells up when the kid falls on his own ax in the forest? There's something seriously wrong with that picture.
2. Nicholas Sparks stories. I don't feel I need to explain this one.
3. Graduation. Never have I met a graduation that could bring me to tears. Good riddance! Bring on the next era.
4. Weddings. Maybe I'm just not romantic enough.

There are many things that would fit into one or the other of these categories that might surprise people. These are just the ones I came up with this weekend. Yay for inner reflection.